Archive for December 19, 2009

9 Years ago today

I can not believe that nine years ago today, my oldest was born.  I was a young mom I didn’t know much and I am shocked at the things I have learned since then.  I really am.  Nine years ago today I work up to my water breaking calling his father and having him come get me to take me to the hospital.  I remember that it.  I was cold and snowing.  Snowing so much that Mr. A’s grandparents came and got his father and I to drive us to the hospital.  I had my over night bag packed and it was pregnancy clothes I thought I would really fit into them after having him.

I know now looking back I knew so very little about child-birth.  Once at the hospital my mother was there and a dear friend Miss J.  Miss J couldn’t stay long and had to head to work but my mom was there for the whole thing and so were Mr. A’s grandparents.

I knew even then though I didn’t know much that I wanted a midwife. To me at that age it seemed to be a magical thing to have someone not a doc but trained to deliver your baby.  To me it was old school it was special and the bonus was that they had the top obgyn in the area that they worked under.

My midwife Mrs. L was great I remember her warmth and her sweetness to this day.  She was there with me through most of it even though she delivered three other babies that day.  She was great with understanding I didn’t want pain meds and never once pushed them.  She got out so many things out for me to try.  I loved the shower and I would have had a water birth if it was for the pit.  But unlike other hospitals (like where I had Mr. R) she let me walk and move as far as the cords would let me. Which was great because laying and sitting hurt.

Another special person who was at the birth of my oldest was my grandmother.  How I love that woman.  She came after work with a love for me to hold when the pain was bad.  She held my hand and told me I was a strong woman and I could do this.  I love her.

So Nine years ago today after 12.5 hours or labor 3 of which was pushing I gave birth to my sweet little boy Mr. A boy was he loved and still is.  He took to nursing like a champ his grandfather who waited outside the door the whole time cried his daddy cried to.  He is still so love.  It might not have been 100% the birth I want now but it was great at the time and one of the best I have had.

So here Nine years later and so much has changed, I am married to Mr. A’s step dad things didn’t work out with his father.  I am living in another state and I have two more beautiful children.

This morning I woke up to my middle child saying we must sign happy birthday to Mr. A we have to mommy.  I love that even though they are nearly 5 years apart in age that they love each other so.  I know that Mr. A came to me at the right time in my life, I know he choose me as a mother and I am blessed to be his mom we have been through some tough times but we have only gotten closer because of it.

Mr. A is nine and already a spiritual child.  He is always asking about religion and God. I don’t know how much is from Mr. A’s bio dad taking him to church or is just from wanting to know.  He loves learning from the book of God (what he calls the bible) and then hearing what I believe and hearing stories I believe to be true.

He looks forward to the Solstice every year and learning what it’s about and what new thing I have learned.  I haven’t had him do any rituals or anything but I do share with him.  I often wonder if he feels the magic this time of the year since he was born so close to the Solstice.  I also wonder what kind of man he will be in 10 years.  I wonder if he will go to college and be one of the many things he wants to be.  I wonder and yet I can wait because these nine have gone by so utterly fast.

Happy Birthday my sweet boy!


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